


GHB

by enchantingmoon (sunnywithclouds)



Category: D (Band)
Genre: Asagi’s cats!, M/M, Mothering Asagi, Tsunehito does get drugged but nothing awful happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-19 10:42:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20329813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnywithclouds/pseuds/enchantingmoon
Summary: “He woke up in stages, not all at once like he normally did. There was a slow rise to consciousness as Tsunehito's mind seemed to fight it's way through a mass of cobwebs that appeared in his head somewhere in the night.His first thought was that he was surprisingly comfortable. Wrapped up in bed, snuggled under soft blankets with cushy pillows and a very warm cat curled up against his belly.His second thought was that he didn't have a cat...”(Originally posted in 2011 to the LJ “enchantingmoon” this was a short and finished chapter fic that I’m posting all in one place here. :) )————————————-





	GHB

He woke up in stages, not all at once like he normally did. There was a slow rise to consciousness as Tsunehito's mind seemed to fight it's way through a mass of cobwebs that appeared in his head somewhere in the night.

His first thought was that he was surprisingly comfortable. Wrapped up in bed, snuggled under soft blankets with cushy pillows and a very warm cat curled up against his belly.

His second thought was that he didn't have a cat...

That forced him up, struggling with the blankets to get himself to sitting as he looked down at the cat who was really not supposed to be here.

"What are.... wait.."

The three words were breathed out as he looked around the room and realized that he wasn't at home. His bedroom wasn't this tidy. It certainly wasn't this nicely decorated either.

Then there was a problem of clothes. Of which he currently had none.

So he was in someone's apartment that he didn't recognize. Naked and in their bed.

With their cat, too, apparently.

What the hell was going on? How did he get here? Wherever here was...

He remembered going out the night before, just out for some drinks and maybe dance a bit as well. He ran into a couple guys he'd met a few times before and they were talking and laughing and having fun then...

Then he remembered waking up here.

There was something vaguely familiar about the room but Tsunehito couldn't place it. It was like something he'd imagined before but hadn't seen, it was that sort of familiarity.

It nagged at him while he looked around in vain to try and find something to wear, eventually coming up with a black t-shirt. Too big for him, but it wasn't his so that wasn't surprising.

It also wasn't clean... As he pulled it on he could smell cigarette smoke, alcohol like someone had spilled a drink on it and a very vibrant undertone of..

Roses..

That stopped him for a moment, one arm only halfway through the sleeve. His eyes turned around the room again taking it all in and he realized where he could be.

It wasn't a place he'd imagined it was a place he'd heard about from Ruiza, the only one in their band that had ever been inside of Asagi's apartment.

"It's... pretty." Ruiza had said with a half shrug and a bit of a smile. "Lots of red, lots of roses, obviously. Old stuff like... Victorian, almost. Why do you want to know?"

It had been a good question and one Tsunehito didn't know how to answer. He hemmed and hawed over it, unable to meet Ruiza's eyes which led to the guitarist to smile just a bit, catching on even without words. He gave in, offering up a lot more details than he'd originally planned to about Asagi's home. Indulging the young bassist who so clearly had a crush.

It was that description of the place, the bedroom, the living room, the kitchen, that he'd found familiar actually standing here.

But that only solved the part of the problem about where he was.. not what he was doing here..

He crept to the bedroom door aiming to just peek out. But the moment he cracked it open the cat on the bed jumped up and totally spoiled his incognito look around outside the closed room by jamming itself through the opening, forcing Tsunehito to open it wider than he'd intended.

"Dammit cat.." He muttered, trying to dodge to one side and stay silent. He peered around the edge of the door and found himself looking up a hallway that led directly into what he assumed was Asagi's living room. He could see the vocalist's back as he sat at his desk and watched as one hand reached down in reflex to rub the ears of the cat that had just bounded out of the room.

Which ultimately gave him away...

Asagi looked down after a moment, seeing which cat it was he was petting and once recognizing it as the one he'd closed in his bedroom with Tsunehito, turned to look over his shoulder at the open bedroom door.

"You're awake." He said, smiling a bit as he managed to catch sight of the bassist who was hiding behind the door. "I thought you'd sleep longer."

Much to Tsunehito's dismay, Asagi got up. He'd wanted the man to stay there, he was wearing his t-shirt and had absolutely no recollection of what had gone on the night before. But since he'd woken up in nothing, tangled in Asagi's sheets he had to assume..

"Don't get up!" He said, far too late since Asagi was well on his way up the hall. He'd even paused to pick something up but Tsunehito's mind wasn't working quickly. The actual words came out as fast as he could force them but it was still an incredibly delayed reaction.

"I thought you might like to get dressed." Asagi said, holding out Tsunehito's clothes to him. Neatly folded and smelling like they were fresh from the drier. "How are you feeling?"

"F..fine.." Tsunehito said as he haltingly and rather jarringly took the small pile of clothing from Asagi's hands. "You washed them?"

"They were pretty messy." The vocalist said calmly, looking Tsunehito over with eyes slightly narrowed. "You're alright? You remember last night?"

"Oh yeah." Tsunehito hedged, trying to get his hips further behind the door, all too aware of how much thigh he was showing just in Asagi's shirt. "Absolutely. Totally fine, totally remember."

Which was a lie on both counts. He wasn't fine and he really didn't remember a thing about the night before. But he was a little worried about saying so, he didn't want insult his bandleader. If he'd been stupid enough to go out, get drunk and then somehow manage to go home with Asagi and sleep with him.. well there was the choice of walking on glass or walking on eggshells to make sure he didn't say anything stupid, wasn't there? You don't insult your god damn band leader by making it clear the sex somehow completely slipped your mind, no matter how drunk you were.

"I should.. um.." He pointed at the clothes, biting into his lower lip as he glanced around a bit. Would Asagi assume he'd just.. change right there in front of him? Clearly there was no reason not to if Asagi had already seen everything he.. had to offer.. But without remembering everything from the night before there was a level of embarrassment attached to it. Not to mention anger since he did like Asagi.. and had wanted him for ages. Now it had happened and he had NO recollection of any of it.  
So not fair..

"Are you hungry?" Asagi asked, turning his back and leaning against the door frame to give Tsunehito some privacy without thinking twice.

"No.." He wasn't hungry. Not at all. He was grateful that Asagi had looked away, giving him time to wriggle out of the man's shirt and pull on his own clothes. "No I think I'm pretty hung over.. I should probably just head home. Thank you, though.."

"You're welcome. But..." Asagi said, tipping his head a bit to peek over his shoulder and once he saw Tsunehito fully clothed again he turned properly. "Are you sure? It would only take me a minute to make you something."

"I'm sure." Tsunehito said, somehow not at all surprised that Asagi was the type to ask his bed partners to stay for breakfast. Or lunch, maybe.. he had no idea what time it was. It was sweet and part of him ached to stay, but he didn't want to eat, he thought for sure if he did he'd just throw it back up all over the clothes Asagi had gone to the trouble of washing.

'Messy', the older man had said. His clothes were 'messy' from the night before. That implied some... rather interesting ideas in Tsunehito's head about what they could have done to get messy. Or maybe the drink Asagi had spilled on his own t-shirt had gotten on him as well and the vocalist had wanted to clean his clothes to apologize.

But if that was the case, why hadn't he washed the dirty t-shirt as well? If that hadn't qualified for washing because of a drink spill then what the fuck had he gotten on his own clothes?

He could guess. And just thinking it made him turn practically purple as he stepped out of the bedroom and started to walk up the hall, aiming to go right for the door.

"Thank you for washing my clothes." He said, jamming his feet in his shoes, already reaching for the door handle. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow at practice?"

"Mm.. I would think so." Asagi said, making no move to stop the younger man but looking altogether worried at the same time. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine. Just hung over and.. it's always a little more comfortable to be hung over in your own place.." He said, forcing an awkward laugh to try and make the whole thing into a joke. "I'll uh.. see you tomorrow.."

Asagi smiled, letting Tsunehito slip through the door and out into the hall, watching him for a moment before he closed the door and locked it again. He couldn't help but chuckle, glancing down at the cat weaving between his ankles.

"He doesn't remember a thing, does he? Poor dove.. Well.. we'll let him decide if he wants to know. No sense in embarrassing him and laying it all out if he'd rather just forget."

As Asagi picked up the cat, holding it against his chest as he went into the kitchen to feed the furry beasts, Tsunehito had just walked out into the street and realized that not only had he forgotten his jacket, he was still holding Asagi's t-shirt in one hand.

Ensuring a very embarrassing face to face at rehearsal tomorrow when he had to return it and also ask for his jacket.

****

"You what!?"

The exclamation came from Hide-zou who was driving himself and Tsunehito to their practice the day following the strange wake up the small bassist had in Asagi's apartment.

"I think I slept with Asagi.." The younger man repeated, grinding the heels of his hands into his eyes in a vain attempt to wake up. He was still tired, his whole body still felt out of whack.

After leaving Asagi's he'd gone straight home and climbed into bed still dressed. He was exhausted, his head hurt and he'd felt sick but he couldn't sleep. His senses felt dulled and blunted and he was dizzy even when lying down.

Honestly he felt like maybe he was still drunk rather than hung over. He'd sort of limped his way through the day alternating between television and the computer to try and distract himself from the thoughts and questions swirling in his head but it wasn't much use.  
When he finally did drop off to sleep it was into a slumber so deep he thought he was going to have a heart attack when he was jolted awake by his alarm clock the next morning.

He'd slept for close to ten hours but still felt like shit.

"How can you think you slept with Asagi? Isn't that something you should know?" Hide-zou asked, glancing at the small man next to him. He was aware of Tsunehito's crush on the eldest band member so it wasn't necessarily surprising that it had happened. The circumstances, however, were questionable.

"I don't know if I did because I can't remember." Tsunehito said, raising his head from his hands to look at his friend. "I remember going out, I remember meeting up with some guys I knew and I remember waking up naked in Asagi's bedroom."

"That's it?"

"That's it. I don't even remember how I managed to run into Asagi at the bar. I don't remember talking to him or anything. I checked my phone to see if maybe I was drunk and called him or texted him or did something stupid like that but I didn't. I got plastered and then managed to forget everything. Figures.."

While Tsunehito was embarrassed and worried about the fact that he didn't remember the events of the night, Hide-zou was a little more suspicious of the idea that Tsunehito lost that much time. It wasn't right. The small man never over drank when he was by himself. He was too worried about getting himself home when there was no one to drive him. And even if he had met up with Asagi and was ensured a ride home, he doubted that Tsunehito would have drank himself into a stupor in the presence of the man he adored. And even if he had done that, he would have been sober enough meeting up with Asagi to remember that before drinking heavily.

It just didn't add up.

"I have to give him his shirt back." Tsunehito said, interrupting Hide-zou's train of thought as he poked at the folded black garment in his bag. "I walked out with it yesterday without thinking.."

"You were wearing his clothes?"

"Sorta.. I got up and couldn't find mine and his shirt was there so I put it on."

"Where were your clothes?" Hide-zou asked as he flicked the turn signal to bring them into the parking lot of their rehearsal space.

"Um.. He washed them for me... Had them ready when I got up.."

"He washed your clothes." Hide-zou said, making it a statement rather than a question, his head turning to look at the smaller man as he parked and turned off the car.

"Yes."

"Why did he wash your clothes?"

"Shouldn't we be getting out?" Tsunehito asked, one hand poised over the handle to open the door even though Hide-zou wasn't making any move to get up.

"Not till I'm done here. He washed your clothes? Why did he wash your clothes?"

"He said they were.. messy.." Tsunehito mumbled the last word, turning red.

"Messy. Like you spilled something on them?"

"That's what I thought since his shirt smelled like alcohol, too. I thought maybe he'd spilled a drink on both of us and washed my clothes for me. But if he had then why didn't he wash his shirt, too?"

"Good question. Maybe you barfed on yourself."

"Oh god.." Tsunehito's eyes went wide as he turned to look at Hide-zou, making the other man laugh with how horrified his expression was. He hadn't even thought of that.. God.. had he thrown up all over himself in front of Asagi? That was just... that was... "I'm not going to practice. I'll wait here for you." He said, settling himself into the seat as though he actually meant it.

"C'mooooon.." Hide-zou said, now moving to open the car door even though he was still wondering what the hell the answer to this rather strange and mysterious situation was. "We've all done it."

"Yeah but.. Why did I have to in front of him? You or Hiroki.. fine whatever. You're my friends. But Asagi? I threw up all over myself in front of Asagi... God.. I can never look at him again."

"Did he have to wash his sheets?" Hide-zou asked before he got out and closed the door behind him. He crossed to the other side to open Tsunehito's door for him, urging the small man to get out.

"I don't think so, why?"

"Because at least then you know you didn't barf on him and yourself both while you were in bed with him, right? That'd spoil the mood something fierce."

"Hide-zou!!" Tsunehito found that motivation to get out of the car, smacking at his taller friend "That's not funny!"

"Hey! Ow! I'm just trying to find a bright side for you, christ.." But even as he protested he grinned, opening the truck to take both their instrument cases out and carry them towards the door as Tsunehito trailed behind him.

"We got a live one." He muttered to Hiroki who was standing in the doorway waving at them both. "Tsunehito and Asagi.." He trailed off there, clicking his tongue a couple of times to insinuate what he meant without words.

"No way.." Hiroki said, raising both eyebrows and glancing at Tsunehito who was still making his way slowly across the parking lot, practically dragging his feet and the bag he was carrying.

"Yeah. But he doesn't remember any of it. Kinda weird, actually. He doesn't remember even seeing Asagi when he was out but he woke up in his bed with nothing on."

Hiroki's raised brows instantly dropped into a deep furrow as he looked at Hide-zou with obvious confusion. "How could he not remember?"

"Dunno." Hide-zou said, raising one shoulder with a slight shrug. "But I'm thinking maybe it wasn't just alcohol he had last night."

Hiroki stayed silent for a second, then contorted his face into a bit of an incredulous expression. "You're not implying Asagi did it.."

"Well who else, then?"

"Could have been anyone." Hiroki said, shaking his head. "Anyone in that bar could have given him a drink with something in it."

"Yeah but.." Hide-zou trailed off, letting out a breath through his nose as Tsunehito walked up the stairs and into the building, obviously more worried about meeting face to face with Asagi than he was about what his friends were talking about.

"Yeah what?" Hiroki asked once they were left alone again. "Asagi wouldn't have done that."

"Yeah but.." Hide-zou started again. "Tsunehito's fucking paranoid about his drinks being tampered with. He never takes drinks from strangers even if the bartender is the one to put them in front of him. If he leaves his glass alone for more than a few seconds he never drinks from it again..."

Hide-zou stopped there for a second, holding up one hand to halt Hiroki who was getting ready to say something to him. "And if for some god forsaken reason he decided to throw caution into the wind last night and drink something questionable, why was it Asagi's apartment he woke up in and not some stranger's?"

Hiroki took a half step back with just one foot, shoulders and face settling into a more sober sort of expression. "Good point.." He said quietly since... Hide-zou's arguments were pretty hard to argue. "So what do we do about it?"

—————————

"Um... Asagi?"

Oblivious to the conversation outside, Tsunehito was facing his problem head on and was approaching Asagi before they even got started. Of course, half the appeal of doing it now was that the only other person around was Ruiza and Ruiza tended to be in his own little world unless you were speaking directly to him.

"Oh.. Tsunehito.. You left your coat at my place." Asagi said when he looked up from what he was working on and saw it was the small bassist addressing him. He reached down a bit and pulled the leather jacket from a bag he had on the floor to hand over to Tsunehito with a smile. "You must have been cold on your way home yesterday."

"No... I.. I took a cab so I wasn't outside much." He'd been thrown off his rehearsed speech. Not that it was much of a speech but he'd had it planned out. Asagi wasn't saying what he'd imagined he would which he supposed was.. sort of to be expected since he wasn't a mind reader... but it still seemed to crimp his plans a bit.

"I.. umm.." Tsunehito trailed off, turning his head to look over at the door as Hide-zou and Hiroki came inside. "I.."

"Yes?" Asagi said, putting down his pen to look at Tsunehito a little more pointedly.

"I accidentally left with your shirt yesterday." He finally spat the words out, pulling the folded black t-shirt out from his bag. "I don't know how I... I just forgot I was holding it. I should have washed it, I'm sorry.."

"It's alright." Asagi said, reaching to take the shirt from Tsunehito, laying it on the desk next to his work, long fingers running over the fabric once before falling away again. "I imagine you weren't feeling well enough to even contemplate doing laundry."

"No I.. I wasn't but.. You went to all the trouble of washing my clothes for me.." He trailed off there, swallowing hard as he felt his cheeks burn again, Hide-zou's words about puking combined with his own thoughts about what might have 'messed' his clothes all jumbling together.

"Your clothes weren't fit to put back on again." Asagi said gently. Oddly gently. Like he was trying to baby Tsunehito on a subject that was especially difficult. "My shirt probably just smells like a bar."

"It does. It smells like smoke and alcohol and..." He trailed off again, eyes raising to meet Asagi's as he realized how pointless it was and weird it may have seemed to know exactly what the shirt smelled like.

"And?" Asagi prompted, smiling a bit and head tilting, waiting to get the final detail.

"R... roses..." Tsunehito said, tripping on the word as though it was twenty syllables, not just two.

Asagi just smiled, lifting the shirt to hold to his nose as he inhaled. Thoughtful for a few moments before his eyes turned to Tsunehito's with a smile that seemed to edge on dark. "It smells more like you."

Tsunehito's breath caught in his chest and a tingle ran straight through his belly to his hips. Just the look on Asagi's face despite the words being so simple. It was enough to make it difficult to think, difficult to stay standing. And seemed to cement the idea that Asagi had far more carnal knowledge about him than he remembered giving.

"I.. didn't.. I didn't have it on for long.." He stumbled over the words, trying to smile a bit. Despite the dizziness that wouldn't leave him entirely and the fact that his mind was still running slow, he wasn't going to miss an opportunity to flirt with the object of his desire. Although trying to do it without letting on he had no idea what had actually gone on might be a little tricky.

"Heeeeeey!" The little meeting of two was interrupted a moment later by Hide-zou who wandered over and smacked a hand on Tsunehito's back, his eyes trained on Asagi. "We going to get started any time soon or are you just going to monopolize Tsunehito's attention all day?"

Asagi raised his head to look at Hide-zou who quite honestly was giving him a pretty dirty look. Across the room Hiroki was doing the same which told him that Tsunehito had related the story of the day before to one or both of them and they weren't pleased with it. Not that they should be, really. As band leader it was likely a bad idea to mix with your members in a personal way, no matter what his intentions were...

"I think we're done." Asagi said levelly, his eyes moving back to Tsunehito's face, the red cheeks and widened eyes that still looked a little glassy and bleary. It made him worry to see him like that but there wasn't much he could do about it, especially if he had his guard dogs barking at him.

"Thank you for bringing my jacket.." Tsunehito mumbled before ducking under Hide-zou's hand to go over to where his bass had been set down to start getting ready.

Hide-zou, however, stayed where he was. Eyeing Asagi.

"Something you wanted?" The vocalist eventually asked when Hide-zou didn't walk away.

"Yeah." Hide-zou said, his chin raising slightly as his look turned downright nasty. "You stay the hell away from him. I know what you did."

"Do you." Asagi said, his head tilting to the side a bit as if amused. "What did I do?"

"You put drugs in his drink to make him go home with you. That's fucked up, Asagi. You're lucky I don't call the cops."

Asagi's lips pressed together as he was trying not to smile. He couldn't help it, the situation was just funny to him no matter how serious the words coming from Hide-zou's mouth were.

"You think it's funny?" Hide-zou spat the next statement out, anger simmering just under the surface now in a much more obvious way. "You're an asshole. And just for the record, you didn't have to turn into some creepy drug handling bastard. He likes you anyways. He's been dying for your attention, you didn't need that shit."

That, actually, took Asagi slightly by surprise. He'd been rather unaware of the fact that Tsunehito liked him, he'd been certain that everything the small man had said the night he stayed in Asagi's apartment was down to the drugs that, yes, had been in something the small man had drank that night. To think he'd been serious...

"Yeah." Hide-zou said, mistaking Asagi's actual surprise for remorse. "He likes you and you fucked it up. Good on you. Asshole."

The guitarist left it at that, turning to march his self righteous way back across the room to sit down next to Tsunehito who was oblivious to everything going on.

****

"What are you telling me?" Tsunehito said, staring at Hide-zou in absolute shock. "You can't be serious.."

They were on a break for lunch. Hide-zou had insisted on taking Tsunehito out with him to pick up their lunch order which gave him some time to lay out the whole situation as he had it figured out.

"Did you drink anything that strangers gave you?" Hide-zou asked, taking this line of battle since it had worked to convince Hiroki.

"No.."

"Did you leave your drink alone for awhile and then come back and finish it?"

"Of course not!" Tsunehito said almost indignantly. "I never do that.."

"Alright. So did you decide to just change your entire outlook on going out by yourself and get absolutely ripped without knowing you had a drive home?"

"No." Tsunehito said again, shaking his head. "But how does that add up to you accusing Asagi, of all people, of drugging me? You're insane, Hide-zou. He wouldn't do something like that." He paused for a second, thumping his back against the seat of the car, mumbling the next line. "He wouldn't have to do something like that I would have gone with him willingly if he'd ever given any indication he felt the same way. Figures the night he actually does I end up not remembering."

"Yeah. So how come you don't remember?" Hide-zou asked, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel while they waited in the drive through. "There's nothing you did differently so how is it possible you don't even remember running into Asagi?"

That... That Tsunehito couldn't answer. Which drove him crazy because he wanted so badly to know what had happened and also because... there really wasn't any logical way to explain the night and his loss of memory without what Hide-zou said being true.

He wouldn't take drinks from people he didn't know. He wouldn't leave his glass unattended and then drink from it again later. He remembered meeting up with his friends, he remembered dancing with them and drinking with them. They were still in his mind. They hadn't been forgotten.

None of them had given him a drink or anything. They all bought their own and his friends had been imbibing much more heavily than he had been. It was just Asagi's presence that remained a missing piece of the puzzle.

And Tsunehito knew without a doubt that had the older man bought him a drink, he wouldn't have thought twice about taking it and drinking it. Both because he trusted him and because he would have been absolutely thrilled at the idea of Asagi paying attention to him. Buying him drinks in a bar...

"God.. Oh shit.."

"Exactly." Hide-zou said before leaning out the window to take the bags of food that were being passed to them. He said his thank yous and pulled away from the restaurant, heading back into traffic towards their rehearsal space. "There's no other way I could figure it out either. Hiroki agrees."

"You told Hiroki?" Tsunehito asked, looking aghast at the man next to him. "What the hell, Hide-zou! Why did you tell him?"

"Because he's your friend, too, and I wanted to get his opinion. I figured if I was missing some glaringly obvious reason for you to blank out and lose an entire night he'd point it out to me and I wouldn't be having this conversation with you right now."

"Great. Just great... Thanks so much for talking about me behind my back."

"I was trying to do you a favour and trying to help you." Hide-zou said, glancing at the small man next to him that was looking absolutely livid. Immediately Hide-zou changed his mind about telling Tsunehito about the conversation he'd had with Asagi. If the bassist was already pissed he'd talked about this to Hiroki he'd likely end up minus a friend if he told him he'd let on to Asagi that Tsunehito liked him and that he'd been talking about calling the cops and stuff.

"Fine. Whatever." Tsunehtio said, turning to look out the window. He wasn't feeling like he had the strength to stay angry, anyways. He was still so tired and worn out that it was more than enough to try and keep from drowning in the possibilities and worries that this conversation had surfaced. He wasn't going to add being mad at Hide-zou to the list of shit he had to deal with.

"Look, I'm sorry." Hide-zou said, genuinely feeling it, too. "I just wanted a second opinion on what I was thinking before I talked to you and it turned into a big mess."

"It's already a big mess." Tsunehito said, letting out a huff of air. "Even before you.. figured out what might have happened."

"Tsune.."

"No, Hide-zou." Tsunehito said, looking over at the other man. "You don't know for sure. Just because it's what's most likely doesn't mean you know without a doubt."

"You're just saying that because you like him. You don't want to admit that he'd do anything wrong."

"So what if I am!" Tsunehito said sharply, his voice growing louder with just the tiniest tremor to it that reeked of heightened emotion. "So what if I'm saying it because I don't want it to be true? It's still an undeniable fact that you weren't there and you didn't SEE him do anything so you can't know for sure."

Hide-zou was quiet for a few moments as he thought about what Tsunehito was saying. He knew that what he'd come up with was logical and made sense. Had Asagi spiked Tsunehito's drink it would make sense that the small man wouldn't even remember running into him but would remember the earlier parts of the night. And since the small man was adamant that he hadn't taken drinks from anyone or left his drink unattended it just added a layer of justification to what he'd been saying.

But it was also undeniable that he hadn't been there and hadn't seen Asagi do it. So no matter how solid his story seemed it was still just a story. It was... probably not a good thing he'd done by confronting Asagi, either... He'd just have to hope that Tsunehito wouldn't hear about it until he had more proof.

"Okay.." Hide-zou eventually said, reaching over to rest a hand on Tsunehito's shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "Okay you're right. I don't know for absolutely certain. But you have to admit that it does seem most logical, right?"

"....Yeah.." Tsunheito replied with just the one word, looking down into his lap. He knew it was most logical even if he refused to admit that it was for certain.

"Alright then. One way or the other we should try and figure out what really happened. Why don't you ask Asagi his side of the story?

Instantly Tsunehito's mind played back the conversation he'd had with Asagi in the doorway of his bedroom. Asagi asking him if he was alright and if he remembered the night before.

Himself replying that he was fine and that he did remember. He'd already told Asagi he remembered. If he went back on it now and admitted he had no idea what had happened it would be embarrassing as hell. Not only that but if what Hide-zou said was wrong and it was something else entirely that had wiped his memory of a night spent with the vocalist... Did he really want to let on he had no idea it had happened? Putting himself in Asagi's place and thinking about the older man coming to him after something like that and confessing he didn't remember a thing..

It would hurt. It'd make him feel like he wasn't even good enough to stick in the other man's mind.

"I can't." Tsunehito said at once, shaking his head. "I can't ask him, I already told him that I didn't remember."

"So?" Hide-zou said, entirely missing the point, for which Tsunehito was actually grateful.

"So if I go back now and ask him and he really did drug me he might realize that I know something isn't right and he wouldn't tell me the truth."

He was talking out of his ass now, just making shit up that sounded legitimate.

"Good point." Hide-zou said, offering relief to Tsunehito that he'd swayed that thought, but instilling a new level of uncertainty inside the guitarist who was now certain he should have kept his mouth shut in front of Asagi earlier since now it could foul up and future interrogations.

"We'll figure something out." Tsunehito said, effectively trying to dismiss the topic entirely as Hide-zou parked, allowing the small man an escape out of the car and towards the building carrying some of the take out bags.

He didn't want to talk about it any more with Hide-zou. He adored his friend and really did put a lot of worth in what was being said to him but..

Tsunheito's eyes drifted across the room as he handed off Ruiza's food to him, landing on Asagi who was quietly working just as he always did. He didn't honestly think that man, that sweet, serious man who had offered to make him breakfast and had washed his clothes for him was capable of doing something so terrible.

"Is that Asagi's?" Ruiza asked, making Tsunehito jump a bit as the words shocked him out of his thoughts.

"Oh.. uh.. yeah.." He held the bags up, looking at the one that was his own and the one that was Asagi's.

"Want me to bring it to him?"

Despite the jokes and the general thought that Ruiza paid absolutely no attention to anything going on around him, he was actually pretty well tuned into everything. People just assumed he wasn't listening to them but he was. He just didn't make a big deal out of it. But it meant that he already knew pretty much everything about what had happened and knew about the thoughts Hide-zou and Hiroki were having about Asagi.

And since he had actually been the first to find out about Tsunehito's crush on Asagi he figured this would be a rather uncomfortable situation for the bassist to be in.

"Actually.. yeah.." Tsunehito said with a nod, holding out the bag to Ruiza with a grateful smile. "Thank you."

He watched as the other small man wandered across the room to deposit the bag next to the vocalist who looked up and smiled his thanks, then Tsunehito himself went to sit down by himself.  
He didn't feel much like talking and wasn't all that interested in eating either but he knew if he didn't at least make an attempt he'd have Hide-zou all over him about it.

And the last thing he wanted was more attention.

He picked at his fries, drinking more than he ate since he felt constantly thirsty, only moving and shifting from the thoughts circling his head when his phone vibrated in his pocket signalling an incoming text.

Absently and with practised movements that required no thought he took it out and flipped it up to read whatever had been sent to him. A seemingly mundane task that didn't at all prepare him for the shock that was contained in just a few simple lines:

_"Tsunehito- I think we should talk Are you busy after practice? ~ Asagi” _

———————————-

"So..." Asagi said after the waitress had set down his coffee and Tsunehito's latte on the table in front of them. "What wisdom has Hide-zou decided to impart on you?"

That threw Tsunehito slightly and he paused with his cup halfway raised to his mouth. He hadn't expected Asagi to bring up Hide-zou of all people, not when he had no idea that Hide-zou had even spoken to Asagi.

He'd texted the vocalist back quickly after receiving the first message, eager to agree to meet with him both because it might give him a chance to try and figure some of this out and also because... well.. He'd be alone with Asagi, wouldn't he? Tsunehito was only convinced on an intellectual level that the man he had a crush on might have drugged his drink.

Might have.

Might.

So he'd made up an excuse to Hide-zou about not needing a ride. Ruiza had oddly enough come to his rescue and said that Tsunehito was going home with him instead. Which made it easy to wait out Hide-zou and Hiroki's exit before he left with Asagi, walking in silence next to the other man towards a coffee place just around the corner.

Now he was being asked about Hide-zou and he honestly had no idea why.

"Pardon?" Tsunehito asked, hedging politely around the question while he tried to work out how it fit into everything.

"I'm assuming Hide-zou has shared his ideas about why you were at my place all night.."

"How do you know about that?" The question was legitimate now and Tsunehito wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"He was kind enough to share it with me. Or rather, he confronted me with it and said I was lucky he wasn't calling the police."

"Oh god..." Tsunehito's eyes dropped and his heart thumped in his chest just thinking about this. Hide-zou... god he adored him but he never thought ahead. Now he'd gone and mouthed off to Asagi without knowing anything for sure and Tsunehito was going to have to try and field all this shit.

"I'm sorry, Asagi.." He mumbled, fiddling with the cup in front of him. "He just doesn't.."

"Think." Asagi finished for him, smiling a bit. "But what I want to know is why he's confronting me with all of this as though it's a mystery when you could have told him exactly what happened?"

Now... Asagi already knew that Tsunehito had absolutely no recollection of the night he'd gone out. It had been glaringly obvious to him before the small man had even left his apartment. Still suffering the effects of the drugs, just as he was now, Asagi wasn't in any mood to try and fill him in then. He didn't particularly want to do it now, either, but it was becoming problematic.

"I um..." Crap. Tsunehito was caught and he knew it. The last thing he wanted to was to be in this spot where he had to tell Asagi he lied to him. But there really wasn't any other way out except to try and lie again. Which he didn't particularly want to do...

"I don't really... remember quite as much as I might have.. led you to believe." He stammered through the sentence without looking up.

"I thought as much." Asagi said, then chuckled when Tsunehito's wide eyes turned upwards to meet his own in surprise. "Well come on, Tsunehito. You weren't exactly the most incredible liar to just say 'oh yeah I remember everything'. Generally speaking it should have inspired more conversation than just that."

"So.. you know I don't... I don't remember anything?" He expected to be mad. Tsunehito kept waiting to be angry that Asagi had let him go on thinking his lie had held but there really wasn't any reason for it especially when now he was looking Asagi in the face he could see the man was worried.

But was he worried about him or was he worried about the truth coming out that he really had drugged him?

"I know. But I thought, perhaps, you remembered parts of it. After Hide-zou spoke to me this morning I realized you must not have much to go on at all. What do you remember?"

"Mm.." He looked down again, letting out a soft breath as he tried to pull it all together once again, although now he was more interested to try and milk his brain fro every last detail. He was talking to someone who had obviously been there, after all.

"I remember getting to the bar and sitting down. I ordered a drink and before I was done it some guys I know showed up. We moved to a table and ordered more drinks and were just hanging out. I danced a bit, drank a little more and then... I woke up in your apartment."

Asagi sat back a bit when Tsunehito finished so quickly. Apparently there was a difference between what he assumed was 'remembering nothing' and what Tsunehito did since he honestly thought the small man would know more. "You must have had far more than I thought.." He said quietly, looking a little more worried. "How do you feel now?"

"Um.. Okay." Tsunehito said, starting to feel a little edgy. Was Asagi talking about drugs? Was he thinking Tsunehito had had more drugs than he originally thought? Or alcohol? Or what exactly?  
"I'm still tired and I have a headache and I'm a little dizzy but... I've had hangovers like this before."

"With memory loss?"

"Well no.." Tsunehito looked down again, turning his cup around and around on the table in front of him slowly. "I don't generally forget stuff when I've been drinking. I don't get sloppy stupid drunk."

"So you don't remember seeing me at all." Asagi said and nodded along with Tsunehito when the small man made that clear. "In that case I'm even more glad I was there..."

That last bit was said softly. Gently, almost and it pulled Tsunehito's gaze back upwards to meet Asagi's warm brown eyes. "What do you mean?" He asked, his heart thumping in his chest.

"How well do you know those friends of yours?" The vocalist asked quietly, more than a little concerned for the small man.

"Well enough. They wouldn't have done anything to me if that's what you're suggesting."

"Are you sure?" Asagi asked, tilting his head a little. "Absolutely certain?"

"They couldn't have. None of them bought me drinks. Or even carried a drink I bought to the table. We ordered from the servers, no one ever got up to buy rounds at the bar."

Asagi didn't want to do this to the poor little thing. He didn't want to say it and basically destroy the truth Tsunehito had in someone but he had to know before anything else happened. Provided it hadn't already.

"You came off the dance floor with one of them. The last dance you had that night." Asagi said, speaking softly and gently to the small man without moving his eyes off of Tsunehito's face. "You sat down and he offered you his glass to drink from since you didn't have one."

"But that was his drink." Tsunehito said, shaking his head a couple of times. "He wouldn't have spiked his own drink."

"Except that he never took another sip out of it after you did." Asagi said, one hand reaching across the table to lay lightly over the back of one of Tsunehito's. "You drank from it, a fair bit since you'd just been dancing, and then handed it back to him. He pushed it to the other side of the table like he was getting it out of the way and then never touched it again."

Tsunehito remembered that. He'd remembered it before, of course, but it hadn't seemed like a particularly lucrative detail because, as he'd said, it was the other guy's drink. Not one someone had bought for him, not one that he'd left alone. It had been sitting on the table with his other friends, he wouldn't have thought... They were his friends for god's sake...

Asagi stayed silent for a little while then continued just as softly. "I didn't think anything of it either. Until I saw you try and get up from the table. You could hardly stand up and it just didn't seem right. They were all laughing but you weren't. If you'd just been drunk you likely would have found it hilarious but you had such a funny look on your face. Like you were confused and lost and... I knew it wasn't right..."

"So..." Tsunehito said the one word barely above a whisper, lifting his eyes from the table to meet Asagi's, feeling like he was about to be sick. "So what happened?"

"They were trying to walk you out so I got up and went over to them. I acted like I'd just seen you and was happy to run into you outside of work. The moment I got near them and was trying to talk to you they started to get nervous. So I asked you if you were alright. Like I was confused about why you weren't saying anything back to me and... they all took off. I guess they figured I'd guess or something, even though I already had it figured out. Once they were gone I picked you up and brought you home with me."

To say Tsunehito was in shock would have been an understatement. Everything in his mind just ground to a halt. Nothing moved, nothing sunk in. It just all sat there in this big indigestible lump in his mind. He never would have guessed any of this and yet... Yet as Asagi told the story it brought hazy sort of memories to the surface of his brain. The fuzzy image of Asagi in front of him in the dim light of the bar. He heard the man say his name like it was coming from a long distance away. The surge of happiness it created all the same, knowing he was seeing Asagi of all people while he was out...

He remembered just barely the feeling of being lifted off the ground and held against someone else but then there was just nothing until he woke up the next morning. But the few memories that did spring up were enough to make it obvious that Asagi was telling the truth. That he hadn't done anything but take care of him.

But he still didn't know everything, did he? He didn't know how his clothes got messed up, didn't know what happened at Asagi's place. Why he'd woken up in Asagi's bed instead of on the couch which he thought might have been more appropriate when taking care of someone you were just sort of friends with...

"Then what?" Tsunehito asked, sliding his hands under the table so that Asagi wouldn't see them shaking. He was scared to know what else had gone on. Ashamed of himself for getting into a situation like that and making it so that Asagi of all people had to come and rescue him. "What happened after you left with me?"

"You don't want to know all of that." Asagi said, shaking his head a couple of times as he looked at the small man. "You don't. It's not even important."

"I think it is." Tsunehito insisted, now more interested in what the hell could have gone on that Asagi would not want to tell him about. "What happened?"

Asagi let out a low breath, turning his eyes away to look out the window next to him as he spoke quietly and grudgingly on a topic he'd not wanted to bring up. It would embarrass the small man horribly, it would hurt him and make him feel bad and that was the last thing Asagi wanted but.. Holding back the information would just make him angry. And truthfully, Tsunehito was entitled to know everything.

"You started to cry when I buckled your seat belt." Asagi started there, keeping his voice just as quiet as before. "You couldn't stop, you couldn't even speak even though you tried to when I asked you what was wrong. It just made you cry harder. You started coughing hard enough that you threw up twice before we got to my apartment."

Tsunehito's head bowed down farther as Asagi started to lay it all out for him. Hearing that he'd started crying. That he'd thrown up in the vocalists car. Twice. And he hadn't even gotten him inside yet.. He kind of wanted to melt into the seat and disappear.

"I kept telling you not to worry. That I knew you were feeling really bad and really weird and that it was probably scary but that I'd make sure you were okay. I got you inside and brought you into the bathroom where we stayed for most of the night. You talked and talked and talked to me.. you only quieted down when you started feeling sick again and had to throw up. But you talked more and said more to me than I think you ever have. Eventually you fell asleep. And when I was certain you weren't going to be sick again in your sleep and choke I carried you into my room to put you to bed where you'd be warmest. I took off your clothes so I could wash them. You'd been sick so much and had been sweating out the drugs effects that I couldn't let you put them back on..."

Asagi had left out some of it. He left out that the 'alcohol' Tsunehito could smell on Asagi's t-shirt was actually his own vomit. The poor thing had thrown up nothing but the drinks he'd had all night, clearly he'd gone out with an empty stomach which is probably why the drugs had hit so hard. But to tell Tsunehito about it would have been cruel. With everything else... There was no way he'd embarrass him even more.

"What did I talk about?" Tsunehito was numb now. There wasn't nothing left to feel, he'd run the gamut of emotion in such a short period of time that now he was left at a loss for what to do or think next. He just felt nothing. Nothing but the need to find out the last details of that night. "What did I say to you?"

"You apologized. Over and over again you told me how sorry you were that I had to take care of you. I kept telling you it was okay and kept telling you I was glad that I was there to do it but it made you cry again so I stopped saying it. You told me that you didn't understand why you were so drunk and you didn't know how you even got to my house. You told me that Ruiza had described my apartment to you and how badly you'd wanted to see it for yourself but not like this, that you'd never wanted to have to see it this way. Then you... seemed to forget you were talking to me after mentioning Ruiza and you grabbed my shirt and begged me not to tell Asagi that you got drunk like this because you didn't want him to know and think you were a bad person. And you begged me not to.. tell Asagi that you.. had feelings for him... That I was the only one who knew and I had to swear never to say anything to.. him.."

Tsunehito's eyes jerked upwards in horror at the last two things Asagi related to him. That he'd said that to him, that even in his drug addled state he'd forgotten who he was talking to and said that to him...

"I took it all with a grain of salt, Tsunehito." Asagi said, trying desperately to smooth things over. Despite what Hide-zou had said to him earlier, he wasn't assuming any of this was true. He hadn't thought what Tsunehito had babbled about what real when he was living the worst effects of the drugs and he wasn't going to try and force anything out of him either way.

"You were so upset and weren't in your right mind. You couldn't even tell you were talking to me for part of the conversation, I'm not telling you any of this thinking you can explain it to me. You don't have to explain it.. the drugs, the alcohol.. That's explanation enough."

There was no measure for the embarrassment Tsunehito was feeling. It burned his insides, clawed it's way up his throat and stung at his eyes making him feel like he was going to burst into tears even without the fucking date rape drug working itself through his system. Regardless of reason, regardless of what Asagi said he couldn't believe he'd acted like that. It was, honestly, far easier for Asagi to accept all of this because he'd seen it. He'd seen the effects the drug had, he could tell the difference. 

Tsunehito remembered none of it. To him there was a mental block that made him feel as though he should have had control of himself. That he should have known what he was saying and doing...

To him there was no excuse for his behaviour.

"I have to go." He said suddenly, getting up from the table so fast he caught the edge of it with his thigh, banging it hard enough to rattle the cups on top of it and slosh coffee onto the surface. But he didn't stop, even though it had hurt. He struggled his way around the seats of the booth, grabbing his bag and heading for the door without another word.

"Tsunehito!" Asagi called after him once. But when the bassist didn't even turn his head to look back, he leaned back against the seat and let out a huff of air. Utterly defeated.

He hadn't expected Tsunehito to take it all gracefully. In his place Asagi knew he would have felt exactly the same way but...

"I liked taking care of you.." Asagi said softly to the place where Tsunehito had just been sitting, getting to the point he hadn't had a chance to make.

"I adore you... You're the whole reason I was even at that bar to begin with, Tsunehito..."

—————————-

Every so often Asagi would swear to himself that he was going to tell Tsunehito how he felt.

He'd make the decision, generally at night while he was in bed trying to sleep, and promise himself he'd do it the next day.

Or maybe the day after that.

Some time in the next week at least...

But he never followed through with it.

He wanted to tell him not because he ever would have assumed the small man would feel the same way but because he felt like he was lying to him by not saying a word. It was irrational, sure. It wasn't lying at all but it was near impossible to dismiss those feelings and he thought for sure that coming clean would solve it.

And just.. you know.. start a whole new rash of problems with discomfort in the workplace.

Asagi couldn't win and he knew it. No matter what he was going to have trouble so he went with what he honestly considered to be the lesser of the two evils and tell him.

At some point. Tomorrow, maybe. Sure.

This had gone on for months. The swearing to himself and the backing down from it the moment he actually saw Tsunehito the next day. But when he overheard Tsunehito telling Hide-zou his plans earlier in the week, that he was going to a bar just on his own to have fun he thought... Maybe he could just run into him there.

Maybe a couple of drinks would help loosen his tongue.

But by the time Asagi had gotten to the bar Tsunehito had talked about, the small man had already tagged up with his 'friends' and they were all sitting at a table. Completely unapproachable in a group.

So Asagi had settled at the bar across the room. Within sight of the young bassist so he could try and catch him alone before he left to go home.

But instead he'd had to intervene when Tsunehito's so called friends drugged him. Rather than tell Tsunehito how he felt, he spent the night taking care of him, making sure he was safe and okay. For Asagi he was so grateful to be there, so glad that he'd gone out and stayed out so that he could be there for Tsunehito and nothing bad had happened to him.

But for Tsunehito... Well Asagi couldn't blame him for running out on him. Having to hear about what happened, about how someone else had had to take care of him like that it would have been absolutely terrible. In his shoes Asagi knew he would have reacted the same way.

However it didn't erase the fact that Asagi had been happy to do it. That while it was a terrible situation that he never ever wanted to see repeated, holding the small man close...

Carrying him upstairs from the car..

Being there to reassure him, to wipe the sweat from his face and tuck him into bed safe and sound when the results of the night could have been so much worse..

He wouldn't have traded it for anything.

****

When Tsunehito left the restaurant he turned off his phone. And when he got home he got into bed and just... stayed there.

He slept off and on through the evening and night but didn't bother getting up the next morning. He wasn't hungry or thirsty. He didn't want to talk to anyone, he just wanted to think.

What Asagi had told him, the summation of events that had taken place at the bar were, without a doubt, true. He remembered enough, as foggy as it was, to know it was Asagi that had stepped in between him and his 'friends'. Asagi had been the one to stop anything terrible happening to him, not the one who did terrible things to him.

And even though he didn't remember anything else he'd been told about, the throwing up, being in Asagi's bathroom all night and talking to the vocalist as though he was someone else.. He could tell by the way Asagi had repeated it that it was true as well.

Which didn't sit well with him at all.

He'd never been so embarrassed in his life. Tsunehito didn't know how he could ever face Asagi again after this. Ignorance had been bliss but he was glad he knew the truth now. No matter how painful and how foul the whole thing was he was glad he knew the truth.

But it changed nothing in his shame. It didn't alleviate any worry he had except that he hadn't forgotten actually having sex with Asagi. There was no way to insult the older man that way... he'd just forgotten throwing up all over his car and his bathroom.

With a groan Tsunehito turned his face into his pillow, his arms tucking around it as he curled in on himself trying to be as tiny as possible in case it just popped him out of existence entirely.

He'd like that.

Maybe Asagi hadn't believed any of the things he'd mouthed off about but it didn't stop them from being true. He did like Asagi. He did have feelings for him and he had begged Ruiza not to tell him. Saying it all to the man in question sort of negated that. By now he was sure Asagi had figured out it was true. If he hadn't rushed from the restaurant to get away from him it might have been different.

But there was no way he could have stayed there...

Not after all that. It was too much to try and digest and over come. Better to leave. And then stay in bed for the rest of his life. Which likely wouldn't be too long since at this point he was convinced he was going to die of embarrassment.

But like all things decided in the heat of the moment, Tsunehito eventually got tired of being in bed with his own thoughts. All it did was make sure that the whole scene kept playing over and over again in his mind which wasn't doing him any good. Eventually he got up and went into his living room and turned on the tv thinking maybe he'd distract himself that way. He was missing a practice by staying at home and while he had absolutely no desire to talk to anyone, he also knew that Hide-zou and Hiroki would be worried.

And no matter how embarrassed he was he didn't want them taking their worry out on Asagi. At the very least he had to absolve the older man of any bad things Hide-zou had accused him of.

He reached for his phone, turning it on and settling back to send a text to Hide-zou, certain it would get passed on to Hiroki and there was no need to do it twice. He'd just hit send when the phone itself started to ring and he turned it over to check the number, sure that it would be a band member.. which is was, but.. not one he'd expected and not one he was actually thinking to ignore.

"Ruiza?" He said as he answered the call, holding the phone to his ear.

"Hi Tsunehito. How are you feeling?" Said the small man on the other end of the line. He was sitting in the rehearsal room near the back, quietly sliding under everyone's radar just like he always did. It offered him privacy for the call while looking around at everyone else. Hide-zou was shoving his phone under Hiroki's nose, both of them glancing over their shoulders at Asagi who was working, as always, at the desk.

But the eldest band member looked tired. Worried. Like he hadn't slept well and when Tsunehito didn't show up for practice Ruiza had guessed why.

"I'm.. alright.." Tsunehito said, uncertain at this point what Ruiza did and didn't know. "How's practice?"

"It's good. Lots of tension today, though.. Asagi looks like he hasn't slept a wink."

Tsunehito fell quiet for a few moments then let out a low breath. "Yeah that's... probably my fault.."

"Mm. You and he talked then? Cleared things up?"

"Sort of.."

"What's sort of?" The question sounded so innocent coming from Ruiza but it was loaded and the guitarist knew it. While as a general rule he didn't get involved, he did like the mental image of himself as cupid actually bringing together the youngest and oldest members of the band who liked each other so much. He played his cards carefully but with absolute purpose.

"He told me what happened at the bar. Hide-zou thought that Asagi drugged me but it was actually him that saved me.. I just sent Hide-zou a message telling him that so he wouldn't be mad at Asagi anymore."

"He got it. I saw him waving his phone at Hiroki to read it. I think that's all taken care of."

There was something about Ruiza that made you want to tell things to him when you talked to him. It might have been how removed he generally seemed from everything. It put him in a trustworthy role as someone uninvolved. And it was because of that feeling that Tsunehito, after a moments pause, just charged into everything that happened.

"I don't know if I can ever look him in the face again!" He said, the first words tumbling out of his mouth, followed by all the other details. "He was so nice to me, I was so.. so.. out of it.. I threw up in his car, I kept him up all night in the bathroom.. He slept on the couch and washed my clothes and I.."

"What?" Ruiza asked mildly, a simple word to prompt more explanation. But mostly because Ruiza wasn't sitting still. He'd gotten up from his chair and wandered across the room to stand next to Asagi. And before Tsunehito started to speak again, he held the phone against Asagi's ear instead, holding one finger to his lips when the dark haired man's eyes flicked upwards in confusion.

"I thought he was you, apparently. I was telling him all about how you told me about his apartment and how much I wanted to see it.. then I seemed to forget who he was and I told him how I felt about him and begged him.. who I thought was you... to not say anything to him. And he said he didn't believe it.. that he knew it was the drugs talking but... I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should try and talk to him again or of I should just let it go. I feel like.. I'm lying now if I don't tell him, but.. I don't want him to know. It'll change everything."

As Tsunehito let out a long low breath, actually feeling a little better now that he'd unloaded that onto what he thought was an impartial ear, Asagi couldn't help but smile just a little bit.

Tsunehito sounded just like him. His own thoughts on liking someone in the band. About feeling like he was lying by not telling him the truth even though he didn't want to. But it was still such a delicate situation. Asagi knew that Tsunehito once again thought he was talking to Ruiza when, in fact, he was speaking directly to the man he was venting about.

"I just... I don't know.." Tsunehito said, sighing again and continuing without waiting for a response from 'Ruiza'. "I can't believe he did all of that for me. That's at the root of it, you know? That he came to my rescue like.. some prince on a white horse. Although with him I'm sure it would be black.."

Asagi laughed. He couldn't help it. And the moment he did he heard the silence on the other end of the line. He'd given himself away but it didn't matter.

"I'm not laughing at you." He said a moment later, the words gentle and soft as he made sure Tsunehito didn't think he was being made fun of.

"Asagi..?"

"It was the black horse comment.. you know me too well. I'd never ride a white horse.."

"How did... I mean.. Where's Ruiza?" Tsunehito's heart was thumping erratically in his chest, wondering just how much of everything Asagi had heard and.. why had he heard it in the first place?

"He's right here. He stuck the phone against my ear, I didn't know what he was doing. Are you alright? I was worried about you when you didn't show up today.."

"I'm.. I was..."

"I know." Asagi said, shaking his head slightly, not even sure why he'd asked the question. Putting Tsunehito in a position to answer something like that wasn't needed and was kind of mean. No need to put him on the spot when you already had the answer. "Sorry.. I shouldn't have asked.."

"No it's okay." Tsunehito said, suddenly realizing it was okay. And he was talking to Asagi and not absolutely burning up with shame. Maybe things would be alright... Not like they used to be, not that comfortable, but maybe not as bad as he'd originally worried about.

"Tsune.." The older man started, shortening Tsunehito's name for likely the first time ever. But he wanted to make this a little more personal. He wanted to make sure he had his attention and that he'd listen to him. "I was at that bar because of you anyways.."

"What do you mean?" Tsunehito asked, his brow furrowing a bit as he pulled his legs up on the couch with him.

"I heard you telling Hide-zou you were going out by yourself. I heard you tell him what bar you were going to and I went because of that." He brought his hand up quickly to catch the phone before it dropped. Ruiza had let go and was wandering back to his chair figuring his duty was done now.

"You.. went to see me?"

"Yes."

After the one syllable response Tsunehito stayed silent, trying to figure out how that worked and WHY Asagi would want to go out and meet him at a bar and why he didn't just..

"Why didn't you tell me? I didn't even know you were there."

"I know." Asagi said, getting up to walk out of the room just in case the others were listening to him. He slipped out the door, standing outside on the steps to the building. "I didn't tell you because I didn't know if I'd even have the guts to talk to you anyways."

"But that doesn't make sense." Tsunehito shook his head a bit, a confused look taking over his features as he tried to figure out how all of this fit into place. "You talk to me all the time."

"I do. But this wasn't just normal talk. There was something I wanted to tell you. I'd been swearing over and over again I'd tell you but I never did. I thought maybe if I was out and you were out and it seemed like a chance encounter it could seem a little more personal."

"What.. did you want to tell me?" Tsunehito could hardly breathe. He was jumping to all kinds of conclusions on what Asagi could want to tell him. Wishful thinking, he thought. Getting his hopes up.

"I wanted to tell you that.. I like you. I adore you. Not just as a band member or as a friend.. As so much more than that. I care about you... I could love you, Tsunehito.. I want to love you..."

Or maybe not.. Wishful thinking had suddenly become a reality.

"Asagi..."

"Look. I know you were drugged and unhappy and in a terrible terrible state when you were here. And when you said you had feelings for me I really did think you were just out of it and talking nonsense. But Hide-zou.. when he confronted me thinking I had drugged you. He said that I didn't have to do something like that. That you would have gone with me willingly because you liked me and I thought maybe.. Maybe there was a little bit of truth in what you said..."

Tsunehito was silent for a few moments, both angry and thrilled that Hide-zou had said something because somehow it opened everything up, didn't it? It got it out there and all he had to do was confirm it, right?

"No." Tsunehito said, but he was smiling as he said it.

"Oh... Oh." Asagi felt his heart sink hearing that negative response. "Hide-zou must have just been screwing with me then. I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have--"

"It's not just a little bit of truth." Tsunehito said, smiling even more. "It's all true. All of it."

It was Asagi's turn to be silent for a few moments, then he laughed as relief and warmth flooded back through him. He leaned forward a bit, still chuckling as he shook his head. "You're mean.."

"I couldn't help it." Tsunehito said, giggling as Asagi chuckled and chastised him. He was still embarrassed by what had happened. No one wants to be seen in a state like that. No matter how caring and understanding they are, it's not a fun thing to have happen to you. But knowing that Asagi wasn't doing it out of some duty bound sort of thing. That he did it because he truly did care and not because he felt he had to.. that changed it a bit.

"So.. was it true that you had Ruiza describe my apartment to you? That you really wanted to see it?"

"Yes." Tsunehtio replied, stretching his legs out, actually relaxing for the first time in almost three days.

"Why?" Asagi asked, shaking his head a bit. "It's just an apartment."

"It's your apartment." Tsunehito replied, trying to explain himself a bit. "Your own personal space. You don't share much with us as a band and I was always curious how you actually lived."

"I suppose you didn't really see much of it when you were here.."

"No I was.. a little preoccupied with waking up naked in a place I didn't recognize. Then freaked out that it was your place and I didn't remember anything. I didn't look around much."

It only took Asagi half a second to see his in. To see the perfect opportunity to start things over again the right way. With everything out in the open and with no chance Tsunehito could forget. "Come over again. Come over tonight." He said in the warm soft voice he tended to use only with Tsunehito.

"Wh...what?"

"Come over. We can order in. You can see everything properly and we can talk properly to. Not over the phone or about anything about that night. Just talk. Together."

Tsunehito fell silent after Asagi spoke. Not because he was deliberating about whether or not he wanted to go, he was just letting it soak in. Giving himself a minute to push down all the embarrassment and weirdness he'd been feeling and just hear what Asagi was saying without that tinting it. The older man was clearly pushing past it as well, trying to bridge the gap that had formed between them through misunderstanding and a really bad night. And he did it so well...

"What time?" Tsunehito said, already getting to his feet so he could shower and get dressed. "Tell me what time and I'll be there."

By the time they'd decided on a meeting time and Asagi had given Tsunehito his apartment number and hung up, nothing in Tsunehito was worried anymore. What he'd gone through was terrible. It was embarrassing and horrifying to say the least.

But Asagi had been there to save him. To take care of him. And Tsunehito knew that if the roles were reversed he would have done exactly the same thing for Asagi and not thought twice about it.

So maybe it was a rocky way to come to realization that they cared about each other.  
But it also, in some ways, laid a foundation to build on. Trust.. understanding..

Knowing each other at their best as well as at their worst.


End file.
